Bitterbarn’s Weblog

aka “The Bull” (some content not suitable for children or religous zealots)

You can’t make this stuff up.


I have wanted to post this story for a few weeks. I have been lost in quandary over how best to tactfully write it; But, the story itself is devoid of tact. Can you write tampon on the Internet? Well, here goes.

I know a lady who teaches aerobics. One morning as she was in the midst of teaching a full class of cardiac fiends (including the principle at her daughters school and 3 male participants) at 0530 AM. The Accessory One Wears While Menstruating (AOWWM) became dislodged from its primary place of purpose. fortunately my friend was wearing long Capri style pants while she taught that morning. However as she could feel the AOWWM begin to move south down her pant leg, she decided she could no longer ignore it. Leaving her class in mid “grapevine-to-the-left”, she said she’d be right back and ran across the gym to the door, down the stairs and to the restroom.

Once she made it to the restroom she couldn’t find it. Right, she couldn’t find it. The AOWWM wasn’t in her pants. Where was it? She quickly re-traced her steps back to the gym. She had hoped the unsightly object would be found on a step or just outside the restroom. She made it all the way back to the gym where her class was dutifully engaged in the routine (as best they could remember) AND THERE IT WAS.

In the middle of the gym, in the middle of the class, on the floor; sat a bright red heme filled cotton bullet, with a tail. Easily mistaken for a little red mouse with a white tail, the class participants stayed perfectly instep with their head and eyes straight ahead. They pretended they didn’t even see her as she walked nonchalantly to the item and picked it up. She quickly disposed of the item in a trash receptacle and went back to teaching the class.

When this story was told to me I was literally rolling on the floor laughing. And the funniest part to me was when she said, “none of this would have happened if I had just worn some panties”. eh? no underwear? Well, I won’t pretend to even have a clue as to why it’s desirable to wear a thong or nothing at all when your a women (something about the wrinkles I gather) but…. there ya go.

October 13, 2007 - Posted by | Uncategorized |

1 Comment »

  1. This made me laugh so hard that my AOWWM dislodged while I was reading it….

    Comment by Holly Brimhall | January 9, 2008 | Reply

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